Thursday, March 12, 2009

Adoption Hardship Issues

Adopted children are sometimes given labels..... they are not the only ones......

In my experience of adopting, I have found that people have sen me in many different ways.
Some people have commented that we are "Special People" for doing what we do. Other people do not....
Our adopted children have been difficult to raise, as we did not get them until they were at the age of eight. They have had their share of "issues."
My husband and I have gotten the label, "UN-fit parents" by teachers, and even friends! We get the blame that it's our fault our children have behavioral issues. We've heard it said that if we were good parents that our children would be good also! They have falsely accused us of not treating them right, or not knowing how to properly discipline.
My son's teacher actually told another teacher right in front of him that he was an UN-controllable child and that it was my fault! She said that I wasn't a very good mother and that,"Some people should just not have kids!" Upon hearing this, my son went into an angry rage and his teacher ended up being kicked in the process. I was called to school to get him. He was suspended. As I entered the school, and walked into the office, I heard the secretaries saying to each other that I was an UN-fit mother! This child had only moved in with us 2 months prior to the school year. Of course there were issues! He was in an emotional support classroom! They never gave that a thought.
Plain ignorance can be a problem when people start stating their opinions.
I heard their ignorance and then they turned and saw me. Their mouths fell to the floor.
I walked right up to the counter and said, " I'm here to get my UN-controllable child! I'll bet you thought I wouldn't show since you judged me as an UN-fit mother, didn't you? and, I know that you know this child has had an abusive history and that he just came to live with us a short time ago, but ignorance is a hard thing to overcome, now isn't it?"
They never said a word! I walked out of the office, down to my son's room and just took him. I never gave the teacher a chance to explain.

Most of the time when we hear ignorance talking, we just ignore it hold our heads high, but sometimes is can be quite a struggle!

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